Quit while you're ahead//Consider it mutual . . .
"I just NEED TO STOP thinking, in general.
That's my problem and what is wrong with me.
When you over think, you overheat.
When you overheat, you over hurt.
I seem stronger than I really am.
We all create that tough facade.
We pretend we are invincible and try to
fake that "nothing can hurt me" mentality
when everyone is watching . . .
I think about too many things at once,
they eventually bleed together and it
becomes overwhelming, to the point
where I can't even distinguish one
issue or feeling from another.
Therefore, I can't even explain or put
my thoughts into words anymore.
Emotion is easy to decipher.
Giving an explanation? Not so much.
The worst is when someone promises they would
NEVER hurt you. Then, they go and break that promise.
It diminishes trust and that creates a problem.
If the promise was never made, it wouldn't be
difficult to deal with or as painful to suffer through...
The unexpected is always expected when it remains
I've learned to accept and live with disappointment,
so it doesn't hurt as bad.
People don't understand the difference between trust
and feeling "safe" around someone.
Trust isn't telling a secret, hoping they will take it to the
grave because you wouldn't be thinking:
"Are they going to tell someone?" every night.
It doesn't eat away at the back of your sub-conscience.
Trust is KNOWING it's confidential when you suddenly
say something or even do something. You already
realize that the person will not place judgement upon you.
It's my fault I don't trust anyone, not someone else's either.
I second guess everything and I always think the worst
possible outcome is what will happen.
All smoke and mirrors, just like people.
Fake and wearing a disguise.
It's just the public's false sense of security
to avoid the reality."