'Fighting With Myself'

Fri, Jun 15, 2012 at 10:18 PM By: MontezCrow

IT ALL GOES DARK!

Blinded by the spite in a fight with my self hate! When I try to let it go, it just comes back and I think about it everyday, guess I'm a little to late! Now I'm trying to do right, but nothing wants to go my way. Today, was a disaster, no it was more like a fucking massacre; with myself and how I feel and what I want to say. But if I let one word out it's bound to make me pay. SO SHUT UP!

Fighting with myself am I crazy?
Hurting myself am I a martyr?
Crying by myself am I delusional?
Don't want to be myself is that to much to ask for?

HERE WE GO AGAIN!

Defeated by the judgment, I'm redundant with my beliefs. I can't just make "him" stop cuz If I could I would, and I wouldn't be hating myself today! I'm not Immaculate and probably never will be. Fuck narcissist's, because I've never loved myself, I'm in hell, my own prison with this sadistic demon. My shadow, My ego, my lifeless clouded soul. And if I get too close to someone they always get hurt! SO GO AWAY!

Fighting with myself am I crazy?
Hurting myself am I a martyr?
Crying by myself am I delusional?
Don't want to be myself is that to much to ask for?

I don't want to be this person. I didn't ask for this, please take this, erase this, make it all go away! Heal my hurt, and everyone that was a part of my pain. Take it away!

Fighting with myself am I crazy? (NO)
Hurting myself am I a martyr? (NO)
Crying by myself am I delusional? (NO)
Don't want to be myself is that to much to ask for?

*this song is not about me, I'm not a mean person lol*

  1. Wind Dancer avatar

    On Sat, Jun 16, 2012 at 1:08 PM, Wind Dancer said:

    I always fight with myself, good thing is always win! (LOL)

    I enjoy your blogs! You have talent in composing! :)

  2. Big Shark avatar

    On Fri, Jun 15, 2012 at 10:53 PM, Big Shark said:

    I was listening to Dirty while reading this so that chorus really managed to come alive :P I enjoyed it, you used a lot of detail in this piece!

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