Burnt KoRn’s blog

  1. No Great Loss

    Fri, Oct 5, 2012 at 1:00 PM 3 Comments

    Bill Clinton is visiting a school. In one class, he asks the students if anyone can give him an example of a "tragedy." One little boy stands up and offers that, "If my best friend, who lives next door, is playing in the street when a car comes by and kills him, that would be a tragedy." "No," Clinton says, "That would be an ACCIDENT." A girl raises her hand. "If a school bus...

  2. Coroner With An Attitude

    Thu, Oct 4, 2012 at 12:40 PM 1 Comments

    In a murder trial, the defense attorney was cross-examining a pathologist. Attorney: Before you signed the death certificate, had you taken the pulse? Coroner: No. Attorney: Did you listen to the heart? Coroner: No. Attorney: Did you check for breathing? Coroner: No. Attorney: So, when you signed the death certificate, you weren't sure the man was dead,...

  3. It's Dark In Here!

    Tue, Oct 2, 2012 at 2:31 PM 2 Comments

    A married woman is having an affair, and whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine-year-old son in the closet. One day the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet, as well. Inside the closet, the little boy says, "It's dark in here, isn't it?" "Yes it is," the man replies. "You wanna buy a baseball?" the little boy asks. "No thanks," the...

  4. Praying Parrots

    Mon, Oct 1, 2012 at 1:29 PM 2 Comments

    A lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots but they only know how to say one thing." "What do they say?" the priest enquired. "They only know how to say, 'Hi, we are prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?'" "That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed. "But I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female...

  5. Crazy Drivers

    Sun, Sep 30, 2012 at 8:05 AM 1 Comments

    There's a senior citizen driving on the highway. His wife calls him on his cell phone and in a worried voice says, "Herman, be careful! I just heard on the radio that there's a madman driving the wrong way on Route 280!" Herman says, "I know, but there isn't just one, there are hundreds!"

  6. Cuckoo

    Fri, Sep 28, 2012 at 1:00 PM 3 Comments

    Just after I got married I was invited out for a night with the boys. I told my wife that I would be home by midnight....promise! The evening went well, the jokes were being told and the beer was going down easy. At around 3 a.m. drunk as a skunk, I went home. Just as I got in the door the cuckoo clock coukooed 3 times. Quickly I realized that she'd probably wake up so I cuckooed...

  7. Professional Animosity

    Thu, Sep 27, 2012 at 1:14 PM 1 Comments

    Two physicians board a flight out of Seattle. One sits in the window seat, the other in the middle seat. Just before take-off, an attorney sits in the seat by the aisle. The lawyer kicks off his shoes, wiggle his toes, and starts to settle in, when the physician in the window seat says, "I think I'll get up and get a coke." "No problem," says the attorney, "I'm by the aisle. I'll get it...

  8. Not Much of a Man

    Wed, Sep 26, 2012 at 9:33 AM 2 Comments

    A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three members of a motorcycle gang walked in. The first walked up to the old man and pushed his cigarette into the old man's pie, and then took a seat at the counter. The second walked up to the old man and spat into his milk, and then he took a seat at the counter. The third walked up to the old man and turned over his plate,...

  9. Kiss My Wife

    Tue, Sep 25, 2012 at 1:02 PM 2 Comments

    A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they...

  10. Part-time Painter

    Mon, Sep 24, 2012 at 1:47 PM 1 Comments

    OK, so i have posted a few jokes now that were pointing at a "boja" now to be honest here I have no clue what a Boja is!!!! So, I have replaced Boja in this joke with my name! To show not only am I not trying at all to offend anyone by this word that I do not even know what it means! But I am in fact willing to make fun of myself just as easy...They are just jokes and are not ment to offend in...