Pretty sure I posted this before but it is funny. Enjoy a 2nd read. I did!
Going to bed the other night, I noticed people in my shed, stealing things. I phoned the police but was told nobody was in the area to help. They said they would send someone over as soon as possible. I hung up.
A minute later, I phoned again. "Hello?" I said. "I called you a minute ago because there were people in my shed. You don't have to worry now because I shot them."
Within minutes, there were half a dozen police cars in the area, plus helicopters and an armed response unit. They caught the burglars red-handed.
One of the officers said, "I thought you said you shot them." To which I replied, "I thought you said there was no one available."